i’ll sleep when i’m dead

source unknown (some blog)Sleeping is a peculiar act, one concurrently revered and abhorred. Without it, normal brain function would be lost and everything from memory and personality to physical strength would be affected. But few could deny that life would be better served by greatly reducing the time spent asleep, or by eliminating sleep altogether. After all, our already limited years are made fewer still by this unfortunately unavoidable process.

One must wonder, then, if life would be more fulfilling were a state of permanent semi-sleep possible. By always functioning at a mere fifty to seventy-five percent of full physical and mental capability, one might then be able to live a whole life without wasting precious seconds for rest. Alas, data from Australia’s National Sleep Research Project (as well as common sense) suggest that this is either not possible or is a terrible idea:

The record for the longest period without sleep is 18 days, 21 hours, 40 minutes during a rocking chair marathon. The record holder reported hallucinations, paranoia, blurred vision, slurred speech and memory and concentration lapses.

Despite the seeming impossibility of a permanent trance to render sleep unnecessary (or obviate sleep, if you will), modern science has done the “impossible” countless times and this task is not beyond its capability. All that is needed is the introduction of biologically-infused nano-scale chips to help regulate cognitive function. The role of sleep in immune system functioning, once more fully-understood, could then be augmented in a similar manner.

Screw it…I’ll let them figure it out. I’m tired.

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