excuse not to carol

The guy who wrote “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town” must not have thought too carefully about the lyrics. Here’s a taste:

He sees you when you’re sleeping
He knows when you’re awake
He knows if you’ve been bad or good
So be good for goodness’ sake!

Ignoring the obviously creepy and vaguely pedophilic overtones, there’s a serious error in logic here. Skipping to the end, we see that the writer/singer/commandant has ordered us to “be good” purely for the sake of goodness, i.e. we should need no motivation to be good other than the pure satisfaction of knowing that we are, indeed, good. (This sentence does not begin with a gerund.) Going back to the beginning, we see that he is describing specific reasons to be good, i.e. Santa Claus is closely monitoring our actions and determining whether or not we deserve presents.

All I’m saying is, don’t build up an argument and then drive home your final and over-arching demand with the introduction of an unrelated (or inaccurate) inclusion. And habanero salsa labeled “hot” is actually hot, despite your assumptions.

(Note: I wasn’t going to say anything, but it would seem that the general population still doesn’t fully understand and needs to be reminded of this everywhere they look: you’re is a contraction of “you” and “are,” whereas your is possessive. Their they’re not interchangeable. For instance, “if you simply use your brain, you’re going to write this correctly every time.” Morons.)

4 thoughts on “excuse not to carol

  1. good point.

    your brother’s shorts and trey’s controllers are readily-available at my house, should they need them before Christmas.

  2. i’ve been looking for a convenient place to store both my weed and my ice cream truck. oh, and my elephant, stampy. thanks for the link.

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